By: Jessica Bertsch

As I approach 15 years of “dating” a Coastie and 13 years of being married to a Coastie, I tend to hear on a routine bases, “I’d love to pray for you.” Or, “How can I pray for you?” In true Jess fashion, I tend to brush over the sentiments and say, “Oh…I’ve got this. God gave me a platter instead of a plate…no worries at all.” Then I chuckle, move on, and end up in fetal position on the couch gnawing on a giant size Godiva chocolate bar realizing my husband is out to sea, I’m solo parenting three children (age seven and under), and I’ve got to keep myself together so I can successfully run a business.

So, considering all of that, I figured maybe it was time to focus on how I could ask for prayer based on the basic needs of those who serve.

I’ve created a calendar that breaks down a different focus for each week. It’s super easy to use, and some tips below might help you as you spend some quiet time covering families that serve in prayer.

Week One: Prayers for the Service Member

Day 1 – Pray for him/her to have strength as a leader.

Day 2 – Pray for the service member to find confidence and clarity in his/her job as he/she is given tasks to accomplish.

Day 3 – Pray for the service member to be safe as he/she fulfills his/her duties.

Day 4 – Pray for the service member to have peace of mind as he/she is away from his/her family.

Day 5 – Pray for the service member to have stability in his/her marriage and to find ways to connect with his/her partner when he/she is working missions that call him/her away from his/her spouse for extended periods of time.

Day 6 – Pray the service member finds encouraging words to use with his/her crew and that he/she steps into being a positive force at his/her job and that negativity is washed away.

Day 7 – Pray for professional growth. Pray that the service member finds peers who pour into him/her and challenge him/her to grow personally.

Week Two: Prayers for Children

Day 8 – Pray that our children easily adjust to their new school/norm.

Day 9 – Pray that our children find genuine friendships and children who are willing to befriend them easily.

Day 10 – Pray our children have peace of mind and that they spend little time worrying about mom/dad who are away. Pray they can be focused on the awesomeness of the here-and-now moments they can experience.

Day 11 – Pray our children find joy on a daily basis.

Day 12 – Pray our children find strength in their family.

Day 13 – Pray our children have peace and understanding as their parent serves. Pray that they attain a sense of appreciation of the sacrifices being made.

Day 14 – Pray our children grow stronger in character and empathy so they can be leaders in their spheres and models of kindness for others.

Week Three: Prayers for a Service Member Spouse

Day 15 – Pray we find strength as we solo parent.

Day 16 – Pray we find genuine friendships and a circle of friends who openly and quickly embrace us.

Day 17 – Pray we have peace of mind in general (e.g., regarding our spouse, finances, children).

Day 18 – Pray we have clarity and wisdom when big decisions need to be made as we’re flying solo.

Day 19 – Pray our professional worth is noticed and appreciated as we move.

Day 20 – Pray we find stability in our marriage.

Day 21 – Pray we find community where we live. Pray that we find people who genuinely want to do life with us even though our stay in that community may be short.

Week Four: Prayers for a Family that Serves

Day 22 – Pray we find creative ways to stay connected as a family.

Day 23 – Pray we find joy and laughter together daily.

Day 24 – Pray we find and make traditions that bond us.

Day 25 – Pray we have financial comfort.

Day 26 – Pray we have good health.

Day 27 – Pray we have safety.

Day 28 – Pray we give grace to one another (and to ourselves).

Week Five: Prayers for the Community that Serves

Day 29 – Pray for our men and women who serve and their safety.

Day 30 – Pray that our men and women who serve have peace of mind as they work tirelessly serving our country.

You’ve made it! Thank you for devoting 30 days to prayer!

While I’m at it…

Thank you for welcoming us into your communities from day one.

Thank you for talking to your kids about how to befriend new kids who show up in their classes.

Thank you for asking us in a genuine way, “How are you really doing?”

Thank you for sending us “out of the blue” thinking-of-you gifts.

Thank you for cheering us on and tearing up as watch welcome home videos.

Thank you for showing up when a hurricane is coming to help me put up my shutters (for the second time).

Thank you for bringing us a hot meal because you know we need a break.

Thank you for inviting our family to your holiday celebrations when you know we’re missing our loved ones.

Thank you for instilling a sense of American pride in your family.

Thank you for taking 30 days to give us focused prayer time. Often times, as a family that serves, we hear, “Thank you for serving.” Well, to that I say, Thank you for praying. Thank you for setting aside focused time to think of the families that serve. Your prayers and continual acts of kindness are greatly appreciated and felt, and for that, we thank you.

Experts say years five to eight have the highest risk rate in marriage (a.k.a. highest divorce period). Some of that risk is associated to getting the seven-year itch. It made me almost chuckle looking at Powerhouse as we approach our seven-year anniversary. Being an entrepreneur is tough. I’ve seen many of my milspouse CEO peers close up shop because it got too tough to hang with their dreams. And trust me—I, too, have battled with the thought of what an 8-5 job would look like to have again.

Here are some pieces of the tough:
• I have been cussed out by a client who was having a bad day. (No worries, the individual later apologized profusely.)
• I have had to buy myself out of contracts because I no longer felt the partnership was healthy.
• I have chosen not to recontract freelancers because they weren’t an ideal fit to the morale of our team.
• I’m the CEO, CFO, and COO.
• At one point, I went over a year without a paycheck.
• I extreme couponed for two years when I started my company to help the overall finances for our family.
• I started a dog boarding business to fund the startup costs of my company.
• I have to deal routinely with thousands of dollars of payments still outstanding. (Note: My team always gets paid and rarely knows that clients haven’t paid.)
• I have to keep my team motivated 24/7.
• I’ve had to clean up messes on my team that I played no part in other than hiring the wrong person.
• I have dealt with jealousy from other milspouses who couldn’t find joy in my company successes.
• I’ve solo-parented for half of my time while building Powerhouse over the past seven years (due to my husband’s sea time)
• On average, I give clients 15-25% more of my time than their contracts pay me.
• I’ve had a company take the basics of our business model (after I disclosed in a meeting how we’re structured) and make their company larger in numbers and revenue than we have.

Those are some of the key, tough moments. Those were battles that made me question entrepreneurship.

BUT…on the flip side, here are the “whys” that my entrepreneur roots are planted and that I’m committed to many years ahead:
• Powerhouse has remained true to giving back 10% each month to people and organizations in need.
• We’ve grown 100% by word of mouth and doubled our revenue most years.
• Powerhouse has not wavered from what I believe are the moral and ethical standards a company should have.
• We’ve provided over 100 people with careers that have supplied stable paychecks.
• Powerhouse has provided over half a million dollars’ worth of jobs over the past five years.
• Our team members have been able to be present with their children, and I’ve remained committed to my children personally as well.
• We have a corporate environment that supports (and encourages) work/life balance.
• Powerhouse aims to foster a team that has the opportunity to be a legit team, just virtually.
• We truly do only create dynamic deliverables…like dreamy goodness that’s hard to find these days.

Moments have been hard, but the victories make the tough parts fade and the good experiences shine.
I am an entrepreneur, and I’m proud of the Powerhouse we’ve become!

As a society, we know about the importance of mentors for children. We want to surround kids with adults who can

provide guidance, serve as role models, and support their growth. We care about their teachers, coaches, tutors, and other adults who spend time with them. We build great teams of knowledgeable, skillful, and caring adults to support our kids.

For some reason, once that transition from childhood to adulthood takes place, we’re expected to have it all figured out. And we’re supposed to successfully navigate that figuring-it-out part solo. What we don’t do, but should, is be just as committed to involving mentors in adult lives—both personally and professionally.

Why You Need a Mentor: A good mentor has experience doing what you want to do and all that comes with it—the hiccups, the roadblocks, the dumpster fires, the accolades, and the achievements. That experience brings with it true empathy rather than platitudes about how it’s all going to be just fine, even if it may not.

She can fill the gap between education and experience, like reminding you that it’s fantastic to promote yourself but even better to make sure you spend a few minutes proofreading before sending that letter out about all the awards you won at your pubic high school (true story). She can “educate” you on what you don’t yet know that you don’t know yet.

A good mentor can open doors for you that otherwise wouldn’t only be locked, but also may be hidden behind a faux set of bookshelves (figuratively speaking, of course, unless fake shelving is your thing and then maybe literally too).

Perhaps most important, a good mentor will tell it like it is. Unlike someone who loves you or is too personally invested in your story, that mentor will give you the professional equivalent of “Yes, Karen. Those pants DO in fact make your butt look big.” And it may hurt. But it will be the kindest thing she could do for you—be real and honest and direct—all with your success in mind.

How to Find a Mentor: So how do you find this mythical creature who will want to help you succeed and invest her time and connect you to others and give the gift of truth? Well, even the most magical of mentors cannot (and should not) be the chief advisor to all the things in your life that perhaps might benefit from mentorship. You don’t have your electrician help with your meal planning, do you? (If you FIND that electrician, please share that phone number this instant.) The person who’s “right” to mentor you as you start a new company probably isn’t going to be the same person you’d seek out to take your business global. Your first priority, then, in finding a mentor is to have clarity about what specifically you’re hoping to do and then start your search with that in mind.

Do your homework. Who is out there who has successfully done that thing you want to do—lose weight, launch a successful business venture, start a nonprofit, adopt a child from a foreign country, (fill in whatever your goal is here)?

Start with your current village; you may be pleasantly surprised to see the experience and expertise that’s already right within your reach. Then expand further out. See who’s on the news or LinkedIn or at whatever industry events are in your field. Be as specific as possible. (For instance, I’d love help getting a book published but have zero intention of writing the next vampire love story. I’d search for successful writers/publishers in the comedic self-help space, if such a genre even exists.)

Once you’ve identified a list of movers and shakers whom you’d love to emulate, dig deeper still. Who on that list volunteers their time? What causes do they care about? What are their interests? What can you glean of their personality and work style? Remember that it’s not just about what they’ve gotten done—it’s about how they’ve done it too. One person’s successful journey isn’t necessarily the secret to your own, and the path they took to their destination matters too. It needs to align with how you operate in this world.

Put yourself out there. Be willing to be vulnerable. Unless you’re looking for help becoming a psychic, chances are pretty good that those potential mentors on your list aren’t tracking your need for a mentor. Open your mouth (or LinkedIn/email) and make the ask. Come up with some version of “You’re successfully doing what I’d love to be able to do and I’d be so grateful for your mentorship” that is authentic for you. Make sure your ask makes it clear that you’ve done that homework referenced above. And that you can share some value a mentoring relationship might bring to them (especially if you’re a meal-planning electrician). Make it clear that you know it will be work and that you’ve got the commitment and drive to put in the effort—in other words, time spent working with you will be a good investment.

Repeat this process again and again. You should always be on the lookout for relationships with others that help you grow. As you gain skills in one area, there will always be other places where you’d benefit from someone else’s expertise. And as you acquire your own expertise, you then have another responsibility that is also a gift. You get to be the mentor. You’ll know the personal satisfaction that can come from contributing to someone else’s growth and achievement. At the end of the day, if we’re doing this “life” thing well, we’re always both mentor and student at the same time. Because there’s always something to learn. And there’s always something to contribute.

We joke that there’s nothing new under the sun. The same younger folks who mock the old-timers among us wear clothing lines recycled from times past and sing lyrics to songs we knew when we ourselves were children. So too, unless you’re an inventor, it is unlikely that your business provides a product or service that someone else, somewhere else, is not also marketing. The key, then, is in how you package or deliver whatever the product, service, or content is that you’re selling. And the great differentiator is creativity.

Paint a picture. Okay, maybe not literally (although a mural would be AWESOME). But use imagery to promote your work. People are visual by nature, and your images will get their attention far more easily than the best-worded content. Be sure you’re adding well-worded content for them to see once you’ve piqued their interest. Capture video of your team (or your team of one—just keeping it real in small business land) at work behind the scenes. Create an infographic of what you do, the pain point you solve, or the progress you’ve made. (We’re super proud of that growth in charitable giving).

Provide value. Sure, all business inherently should be about providing value to customers. But if you want to stand out, go the extra mile. Not everything you offer has to be about making a profit. Share your expertise. Be a resource for the people who trust you with their dollars and business. Like these great (free!) MILLIE Toolkits that can help guide you through a PCS from start to finish. Incidentally, giving away something that you’ve invested time and love in is good for business.

Be generous with your gratitude. You could simply put whatever you sell in a box and send it out in the mail. But everybody’s doing that. Be creative about how you show your love for the people who keep your business lights on (literally and figuratively). Send a handwritten thank-you note. Toss in a free product or coupon code. Showcase their work if you’re providing services to them. Give them a shout-out for their business (unless you’re selling something that requires some discretion, and then maybe don’t advertise how glad you are they’ve bought your incontinence products, for example.)

Create your own league of super fans. Super fans are people who are delighted with the products or services you offer. They’re your purpose as a business owner. They’re also your best marketing tool. Get their quotes and endorsements. Ask for those positive reviews that you can promote on your website and social media. Capture photos of people wearing/using your products in the most interesting/far-away/unusual places via a photo or video contest. Hold a “best caption” challenge. Make it “cool” (or at least remotely entertaining) to be someone who purchases what you’re selling.

Brag on yourself. Well, not in an unbecoming way, but if you can’t speak well of whatever you’re selling, making, or providing, then how do you expect other people to be excited about it? Want to see a great example of this? Check out Cape Henry Associates. They don’t just tell you what they do—they show you with engaging video. Put yourself out there to the extent that you’re comfortable and then a little bit more (because growth comes in the uncomfortable places). Allow yourself to be interviewed about what you do or sell. Provide content to sources beyond your website and social media properties.

Pick and choose from any or all of the above. Better yet, figure out how to add your own special spin to your efforts. And across it all, be authentically you. The most creative thing you can do is be yourself.